In the club

My niece Leslie emailed me yesterday about a friend who gave birth to a stillborn baby girl. She wanted to know if I, as the parent of a baby that also died, had any words of wisdom for her friend. I believe time helps, but there are just so many tears you need to cry. After nearly 18 years, those tears are rare, but we still think about how things might be different if Patrick was around.

So now niece Leslie's friend is in the club nobody should ever have to be in. And she got booted out of the "things like that happen to other people" club. I'll be thinking of her, and her husband and the grief journey they're on. I hope people wrap this couple in their arms and help them through this process.

On to cheerier topics. Last night I met Paul and friends in Norwalk at the Creston/DCG boy's soccer game. The boys lost, unfortunately, but it was fun seeing Lucy and Jim and Joan and Greg and my honey of course. After the game we stopped at a restaurant. Ah memories of the old baseball/football/basketball/soccer days. All three couples have sons that graduated in 2007. Below - one of Jud's early soccer teams. Jud was in his blond dye stage - right in front of Paul on the right.

When Amy played sports there were some parents we hung out with, but through the years most of the girls quit participating, so Paul and I usually drove to games by ourselves. With Jud's group, a large number of boys stuck together and stuck it out through their senior year in several sports. We parents got to know each other well, and became good friends.

While I don't miss the days of stressing over playing time, victories and referees, I miss the camaraderie we had. Carpooling saved us all mileage and allowed us time to learn about each other's lives and families. We became close friends. There's nothing like friends!