The spiritual me

After hearing about my sports-related ego, you would probably be surprised to hear about my faith. I struggle at times, as all people do. Being Catholic is a joy and a burden.

I love the basis of the church, but dislike the politics of the people that run the joint. And the business of it. I love the routine of Mass, even all the kneeling, sitting and standing. I like the prayers and the sameness.

We Catholics are known for lousy music (at least our little church is). The music booklets we use don't even show harmony - just the basic tune - so I have to give it my best shot because I'm a recovering soprano trying to go alto. I love the hymns - many are so simple but contain such powerful messages. Here is one we sang last week that I found online.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DD58ekAzJyA

In case you don't want to take time to listen, the words of the song are: "Open my eyes Lord, help me to see your face
Open my my ears Lord, help me to hear your voice...
Open my heart Lord, help me to love like you...
I live within you...rest now in me.

This is a message I vowed to be mindful of during the week. Powerful stuff huh?

During Mass I also find that my mind wanders to things like "what shall I have for supper?" and I worry about the children. Mass is a good time for me to take time to think over how things are going - as the words say - in what I have done and in what I have failed to do. And asking for forgiveness. Powerful stuff!

I've threatened to quit the church all together because of the political crap they do, and the guy club they have. The men make me crazy furious! But for now I know that quitting won't help, it will just leave me looking for a church replacement to get my spiritual fix. And it will leave Paul upset.

I truly hope Amy and Jud someday find a spiritual outlet that fits them. It's good to have a base like that. I'm not sure what I believe - a supreme being, a blessed trinity or what.

All I know is I'm not just on this Earth to live me little life and die - there is a more powerful force beyond myself at work. It's a good thing too, because I'm sure not perfect! Just like my goals to improve my diet and my physical self, I have other types of goals. (just in case you're worried about my swearing, partying ways...)