My Momma

I was in the gawky "I can't smile or do my hair years" okay?

I was the in the gawky "I have a baby and don't have time for me years" okay?

I've been missing my mom this week. And my second mom, Laura Goldsmith too. I'm jealous of all my friends who are able to get together with their mommas today, Mother's Day 2012.

I've said before that later in my mother's life I didn't always like her. She had a mean streak that was fueled by alcohol, or perhaps she had some depression going on. Regardless of the cause, none of us enjoyed being around Mom in the throes of that monster. Thankfully, the monster came in spurts, surrounded by good Mom.

Today I'm remembering the good Mom. Smart - she graduated with the honor of Phi Beta Kappa at the University of Iowa. I didn't get this great intelligence of mine out of the air ya know...haha. She loved to travel and learn new things. When she had a trip planned, she'd buy a book on the location - Greek Isles, or coast of California. Then she'd plot her attack!

Mom tried to figure out what type of kid each one of we four girls were - to help us find a college and course of study right for us.

• Susi - Temple Buell Women's College in Denver for Sociology
• Cindy - Drake University - Art Education
• Me - Iowa State University for Pre-Vet (yep, didn't last too long - after I figured out one need straight As to get into vet school, and I wasn't good at chem OR biology. Mom and I whiffed on that one!)
• Betsy - Creighton for Registered Nursing

Then Mom decided she'd like to take each of us on a trip. This was after she'd gone to Scotland on a golf trip with Dad and Harv and Joyce Whissler - old friends. Mom came home from that trip with a knee length suede coat, lined with shearling. You could hardly bend your arms in it, but she loved it so much, we cleaned it out of her closet years later when she passed away...

Our trips:

• Betso went to England and Ireland
• Cindo got to tour the European countries like France, Germany, Amsterdam
• Susi and Mom went to Turkey and Greece
• I flew into Norway with Mom and we went by train to Sweden, flew to Finland and back and went to denmark by ferry. That was in 1983 - the year after Paul and I got married.

Of course Mom did all the research ahead of time and could explain the history of what we were seeing to me before the tour guide did!

Mom and I also did a couple stateside trips. In 1992 we flew to Betsy's in SE Washington State, rented a car and drove down the coast of California on Highway 101? to San Francisco for my cousin David's wedding. Mom had researched the trip and had us staying someplace interesting each night (a resort that took us to rooms in VW buses, a resort made from 1 giant redwood tree). All I had to do was drive! I was still in recovering after losing Baby Patrick the year before - and it was a nice little break from raising two kids. (Absence DOES make the heart grow fonder!).

Mom and me at a champagne plant 1992

Then in 1996, the year Mom was diagnosed with lung cancer (heavy smoker, that girl) she and I did a road trip to NE Iowa. We took Amy to meet Paul's sister in Galena, so Amy could stay with cousin Sarah for a few days. Then Mom and I headed up to Cassville(?) (Mom would remember all these names/places) where there was a ferry back across the river to Iowa. There was a button to push on a board to let the ferry know to come pick us up. A group of women from Dubuque were also waiting. Soon the ferry arrived and we drove the car on - away we went! We stayed in Marquette at a hotel on a bluff with a large pink elephant to greet us. I had my first riverboat casino experience. Probably lost my usual $20!

The next day we visited the Bily Clocks in Spillville, and Governor Larabie's Mansion in Clermont. She had planned it all out of course. That night we ended up in Independence where she had spent some time in her childhood. Mom grew up in Cedar Rapids, the youngest of 3. She must have been an oops - 10 years younger than her sibs. We walked the cemetery trying to find her people.

I must say those trips were my favorite times with my mother. Away from the pressures of being Pat Bullock, she was fun and we really enjoyed each other's company. I wish I could have known her longer. I wish my children could have gotten to know her better.