Happy Empty Nest

You won't find a lot of people who are willing to admit that they are enjoying having an "empty nest". I raise my hand proudly to be known as such a person. I haven't exactly been the sentimental type when it comes to kid's milestones.

I wasn't the woman sobbing after taking her child to kindergarten for the first time. Okay there was that time I sobbed outside of St. Malachy, where our kids went to school. But that was because Jud, who was a mere kindergartner at the time, refused to go to school. He wedged his little muscular body in the van, and I couldn't get him out.

I trotted into school and cried on Principal John Walsh's shoulder. John told me to ignore this behavior (Jud's, not mine) and take a walk to get some coffee. When I came back, Jud was ready to go in. No matter that there was only 15 minutes of school left - that was back when we had half day kindergarten. Jud never ditched school again! (at least that I know of...) Guess it was embarrassing having your mom melt down at your school.

Anyway, I was the mom making the raise the roof sign when our kids graduated from high school. Both kids elected to go away to college, even though we have a good community college in town. Both Paul and I had wonderful 4 year college experiences, and hoped our kids could experience that too. It's not for everyone, but it can be a great way to begin life away from mom and dad.

Sure, I was a bit sentimental when we delivered each child to college. The funny thing is that it was grocery shopping the first time after they left that got me the most. No buying pita chips for Amy or pudding and Lucky Charms for Jud. It was strange not having a volleyball, basketball, football or soccer game to go to. I missed the other parents who we bonded with over competition through some 12 years. Before I knew it though, I was used to empty nest life.

I never had much patience for babies or toddlers. I was the mom who was happy to go back to working with adults when my maternity leave was over. We were so fortunate that we found wonderful daycare providers for our kids. I feel for parents of young children going through the childhood illness era. Teething, flu, ear infections, tonsils and more.

Parenting young adults (Amy is 23 and Jud just turned 20) isn't always a breeze, but daily life is certainly less complicated. We're close to our children, but they are developing lives of their own - just as it should be.

Paul and I like to hang out together. He's my best friend, and we like many of the same activities. We also each enjoy activities a part from each other. Which I think is healthy for any relationship. We like to visit Amy and Jud and like when they come home. Someday I hope we'll have grand children to spoil. But not for a while!

Sometimes I feel like a schmuck - being this happy that my kids are growing up. But mostly I feel happy that they are becoming independent, self confident adults.