Mother's Day

It's the day past Mother's Day. I've been a mommy for 32 years now. Yes, I count my "pregnant with Amy" year. I scored a diamond necklace that Mother's Day! The two of us were living in Osage, and we headed Austin, MN that weekend to shop a bit.

I was still in the earlier stages of pregnancy - not yet full-on big and bitchy. He had always told me if I ever spied a deer before he did, he'd get me a diamond necklace. I know, it doesn't sound like much a feat today. But back then, deer were still rare. (If only...). It took me a long time. I'd been searching for a couple years by then. That day I scored!

I still think of that when I wear the necklace. It's not a big diamond, but I love it. The funny thing is, Paul still yells out, "there's a deer!" every time he sees one. Like it's a rare creature. Right. Anyhow, I still love him, father of my children.

Not sure who was driving...

When Mother's Day rolls around, somehow I always feel like an imposter. It's supposed to be for MY mom, not me. Even though she's been gone 20 years this year. And sadly, I didn't value her as much as I should have when she was here. First I was busy being a self-centered young person. Then I was busy being a young mommy.

I was in about 8th grade here. Don't tip Dad! Are those socks he has on?  

I miss my mom. In her honor, I published the picture above on Facebook. It's  from the early 1970's. Mom got the idea that she wanted a sailboat. So she switched cigarette brands for a while - from Virginia Slims to Kool, collecting carton ends to purchase a Kool Sailboat. I remember when the styrofoam boat was delivered and we had to put fiberglass sheets on the bottom and smear epoxy glue over them to harden and protect the boat. The result was a lightweight boat that held 3 people or 4 if 2 were little kids.

I don't remember how we got the boat over to Lake Anita. Periodically we'd head over there and said. Susi and Cindy had attended Camp Lake Hubert in Minnesota and knew how to sail, but I don't think Mom and Dad knew a thing about it. The Deters like to go over with Mom and Dad too. There may have been some beverages - perhaps a trip to the Redwood.

The boat's official name was "the Bullfrog" and they joked that they should put the letters on upside down - as that was how they sailed it. I wonder if they Dad's wallet when they drained the lake a couple years ago? Happy Mother's Day Momma. Love you.

I was childless this Mother's Day because the kids live far away. But the offspring represented very well! Flowers on Saturday from Jud and Kara, with a gift - a way cool dish towel from an environmentally friendly company. Amy made a great donation to an organization I care deeply about. I've told them before - don't get me anything. They disobeyed! And they both called. Jud fessed up that Kara took care of the gifts. Daughter-in-laws rock. Soon Amy will be married and we'll have another son - Corey! I'm so glad I'm a mommy.

Paul treated me well on Mother's Day even though I'm not his mommy. He talked me into riding 14 miles on my bike. At least there were some nice cool stops along the way. And beer. And water. I'm very careful about drinking and biking because I'm a brittle old girl! Great weekend.

Warm Blankets

My friend Shelly Codner posted recently that she was washing bedding and had a flashback of the days when she used to rush her "warm from the dryer" blankets to her kids to snuggle them as they watched television. .

Of course, I couldn't resist and posted something like, "Geez, my kids got cheated cuz I never did that...". Another mutual friend (smartass Scott, yet accurate) posted, "Probably explains why your kids moved out of state." Touche!

In my defense, in our first Creston home, the laundry room was buried in the back corner of the basement. To get there with loads of laundry, I had to maneuver over the baby gate, down a steep flight of carpeted stairs, through the narrow confines of the hot tub room (a whole 'nother story) and into the utility room. By the time i "rushed" warm blankets up, they would have been luke-warm at best...

Still, the thought never crossed my mind. Have I ever mentioned what a function-oriented person I am? That's why I have a hard time doing things that aren't part of the plan - like making the bed. Even  decorating for holidays is beyond me. Planning events with decorations and flowers? Ugh. I'm much better at meeting planning where nobody expects fancy food and beauty. I certainly appreciate that others have an eye and talent for those things. I love the results - just can't make it happen!

I'm planning a Leadership Training segment for a November meeting for a stakeholder group I work with and met with the presenter this week. We talked about identifying personality types. She said good leaders are adept at putting people with different personality types together and matching skill sets on projects to ensure the best outcomes. The training is going to be great!

Unfortunately, parents don't always get to do that. Our team, Paul and me, was made up of two functional persons and zero artsy people. Looking back, I wish I'd spend more time enjoying warm blankets - instead of rushing them off to the make up the beds. Nevertheless, we managed! We are even invited to visit the offspring out of state.

But we are who we are - I didn't fall too far from my mother's tree. I've blogged about her sometimes brusk style that that seemed harsh at the time, but made me who I am today. We can control our actions. I try to make a conscious effort to find ways to blanket our family from afar. Just don't put me in charge of decorating with fancy stuff. ;>)

Can't Go For That, No Can Do

Hall & Oates is (are?) coming to Des Moines next Monday night. I've been a fan since the late 1970's. I'm not sure who introduced me to this duo, but I purchased and fell in love with the Abandoned Luncheonette album (yes, real vinyl), before the group reached more Top-40 acclaim.

College years with Vic and Robyn

The album's headliner song lyrics resonated then as they do now.

They sat in an abandoned luncheonette
Sipping imaginary cola and drawing faces in the tabletop dust
His voice was rusty from years as a sergeant in "this man's army"
They were old and crusty

She was twenty when the diner was a baby
He was the dishwasher, busy in the back, his hands covered with
Gravy
Hair black and wavy
Brilliantine slick, a pot - cleaning dandy
He was young and randy

Day to day, to day today
Then they were old, their lives wasted away
Month to month, year to year
They all run together

Time measured by the peeling of paint on the luncheonette wall

They sat together in the empty diner

Filled with cracked china

Old news was blowing across the filthy floor

And the sign on the door read "this way out", that's all it read

That's all it said

I was nineteen or twenty years old when I fell in love with this song and the lyrics. Already realizing the nostalgia for times past. I wasn't in Atlantic anymore - I was a big college girl with a world ahead of me. But I've always been one to value my roots - maybe too much sometimes. I have to fight the urge to hold on to things sometimes. There's much worth grasping to my heart. And some I should toss.

I can't wait for the concert. Paul wasn't even my boyfriend when I discovered this band. We'll have a great time watching (and singing along) to them together. 

Old pic of Amy with college roomies Jenna and Rachelle

Amy is coming for a visit later this week. Her college roomie, Rachelle, is having her bachelorette celebration in Des Moines. Amy and I are planning to do some shopping. Mama needs a wedding dress! We are looking forward to time with our girl. Amy loves her college buddies - they'll be her bridesmaids in August. Some things (people) are worth hanging onto. 

The Next Stage of Life

The City of Creston lost a favorite son, my friend Linda lost her husband, the Landers children lost a father, and I (and lots of others) lost a friend. Michael (Mick) Landers passed away recently. He was the assistant fire chief in Creston, so his send off was magnificent. Mick died after a valiant battle against evil colon cancer. He was only 51.  

Paul and I attended the visitation where two firemen stood guard as he lay in state. It was comforting to see so many familiar faces at the funeral home. My friend Jeanne now works there - she'll be a great comfort to grieving families. She's such a warm wonderful person. 

Mick's family was lined up to greet people. They were doing pretty well, considering. I blubbered. Geez. At least I'm a good hugger. I really liked that guy. So did lots of others, judging by the line at the funeral home - which included several of our friends. We ended up catching supper with them. At times like that, it's very comforting to be surrounded by friends. 

I didn't really know Mick until somehow I talked him into working part-time for the Union County Landfill with me back in the early 2000's. He was trained to handle household hazardous waste and I needed a buddy to help me do that. And drive a truck with a trailer. We spent many hours together driving to Bedford, Mount Ayr, Atlantic and Audubon to collect drums and boxes of material. 

Those trips also involved hunting down local diners in search of pie! Of course, we spent time trading kid/parenting stories and many other topics along the way. I learned that he was a very honorable single dad, a hard worker, and an all around nice guy. Then he started dating my pal, Linda. Soon love was in the air! I was so happy for both of them when they married. 

Life is mysterious. I don't know what happens next. Mick was a man of faith and I know he is someplace good. After the funeral at the church, the Creston fire station did a ceremony that included the last call. It was heart-wrenching. RIP my friend. 

  

Happy Anniversary!

I can't believe it's been a year since these marvelous young people tied the knot. Jud and Kara's wedding day was a beautiful event. What's been even better has been watching these two make their lives together in the past year. The two have been together since college. Marriage looks good on them!

Today was a beautiful day, just like we were blessed with one year ago. I couldn't help but think about what we were doing one year ago - loved ones were assembled, dressed up in our pretty clothes, hearing the vows, celebrating and finally dining, dancing and drinking. Just a bit.

The wedding was so pretty, they have used pics from the event in their brochure! #fairytalewedding. 

Jud and Kara spent the day hiking in the park where Jud proposed. They took a picnic and even had some wedding cake - fresh from the bakery (not frozen like we used to do). They exchanged paper gifts. Next month they are going on a trip to England, Ireland, and Scotland. In addition to the usual site-seeing, Jud is fired up to see his fave soccer team in action. Compromise in action! See, this relationship is made to last. 

One of the other memorable things about Jud and Kara's wedding was what happened the day after. Amy's boyfriend Corey Park asked Paul and me if he could marry our daughter. Gulp! It was really sweet and of course, we said yes. We had to wait for him to pop to Q to her in May. 

Now here we are, a year later, counting down to their wedding day in August. Next year I look forward to seeing that comfortable "married" look on them too. 

For all the "Days"

Before I left for our annual Florida vacation, Facebook notified me that it was Crayola Day. Man, that brought back some memories. The 24  and 48 packs - new for school each year. Such potential! Worksheets and coloring contests ahead. How about the 64 packs with the sharpener in the back?

I lamented that though I was an eager colorer, I was not the best. Our artistic sister Cindo ruled in that department. Sister Betsy reminded me that, reminiscing about when we road-tripped to Florida a couple summers in the late 1960's - Mom with her four girls. Dad flew in later. The three of us younger girls were in the back seat while Susi and Mom drove. Armed with paper and Crayolas, Cindy made us paper dolls and colored them. #socool. She was ahead of her time - Etsy-worthy.

Gang's all here

Early in April this year, I was back in Florida and it was Sibling Day. And I was with my sib, the famous coloring artist, Cindo. Oh, how I look forward to that annual trek. It nearly didn't happen this year because the condo we've been renting was sold. Fortunately, our connection came up with another unit in Mom and Dad's building. Each year I appreciate it more - the opportunity to hang out with my sister, nephew, and husband on a beautiful beach.

Me and my sibling

Colby took this shot poolside

Florida is my recharge time. We don't do much while we're there. Paul and Colby fished a couple days. We walked on the beach nearly every day - #10,000 steps baby. To mix it up this year we visited the Everglades for an airboat ride and even saw a gator dozing in the sun.

Happy Place

My favorite thing, besides catching up with Colby (who brought us some of his newly developed product, Bold Hot Sauce, label designed by Amy Goldsmith) and Cindy, was sitting on the 17th-floor deck reading, overlooking the beach and pool. That is my happy place.

Paul and friend

A ten-day vacation was perfect as I was ready to go home. Cindy had the exciting ride with a plane with broken flaps - and emergency landing in Houston. All calm for us, except for one excited elderly doggy! It's always good to sleep in my own bed. Work awaited. And the whole politics thing...

Glad it's a weekend already!

Where's the purple?

My view of the Iowa State Capitol one morning this week

I can sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too! But my voice is less than stellar (okay, bad), so don't get me started. Speaking of rainbows-

Recently Paul and I got together with red friends (you know, the right-leaning kinda red). We actually broke the no-speaky taboo and discussed politics. Paul is actually a registered Republican (just pretend red in my opinion) and of course, my fave color is blue. It was very refreshing to talk politics in "mixed" company!

It made me pine for the days when I didn't identify the people I know by colors. Now I feel I must evaluate the crowd I'm with and muffle thoughts, or at the very least comments. I'm sure people do that around me too! What has happened to us?

Something needs to change. All this separation is bad for our country. We need to talk about issues in mixed groups, like Paul and I did a few nights ago with our friends. To share thoughts and concerns - instead of only hearing anecdotes on our own carefully chosen media outlets.

I think if we talked in mixed company more, we'd find that we're not so much blue and red, but varying shades of purple. Of course, I'd be the better-looking more bluish shade of purple (haha).

I was sad to see my beloved Cyclones lose in the NCAA tourney. I love this time of year - especially when my team is playing. Though it can be nerve-wracking! Pablo and I are hoops hounds and watch lots of games, if I can stay awake... Good luck to my sister's fam favorite, the Zags of Gonzaga (pronounced Gone Zag (like sag) A). My nephew Eric is a grad and niece Sarah is a junior there. If the Cyclones can't win it, I pick the Zags!