Free Range Children

I didn't really read the story - but I got the gist. Somewhere out east, a dogwalker saw some "loose" children at play in a park. They were GASP not being supervised by an adult. Gulp. How dare they. The children were taken in by some type of protective services and the parents were arrested. Someone labeled them the "Free Range Kids" - like they were chickens.

Um, I'd like to put out a warrant for the parents in Atlantic, Iowa in the 1960's and 70's. You're busted! I know it's a different era now - but arrest. Really? Kids can't even go to the park?

Mom's fortress - as painted by Marilyn VanAntwerp

Last summer a little girl was taken in here in Des Moines because she was left at a park all day. I can't remember if her Mom was working? Looking for work? In a bar? That made headlines too. The little girl was around eight years old, and didn't have any way to have lunch - so that's understandable that people were upset that she was left alone. So what is acceptable?

I saw a funny blog last week "What Would Mom Do?" Sneak preview - Lock us outside and drink a Tab.

That was pretty much our childhood - but Mom didn't lock the door - she just shooed us out. We ragamuffins did show up for meals though. Peanut butter sandwiches with a lettuce leaf in it. Iceberg!

Cindo and me today

When I got to hang out with my big sis Cindo on vaca in sunny Florida (Yeah, I'm rubbing it in), we talked about our idyllic childhood. The neighborhood was our kingdom! We'd trot through storm sewers, climb barbed wire fences up above Bredensteiner's house to get to the pond (Thar be frogs here!), and make anyone's yard our own. Any open space was open season for a pickup game of anything - football, freeze tag, hide and seek, and kick the can. My mother didn't lay eyes on us for hours at a time. Free range!

As a young adult I was a life guard at Sunnyside Pool. There I saw many Free Range children - on their own for the day....or under the life guard's supervision only. That meant they'd come and go to the park, eat junk if they had any money. Freeze if they only had a towel and it got cold. There was nobody at home if their parent(s) worked. Many rode their bikes to the pool (no helmet), or were dropped off with a wave. They survived.

I'm not advocating that everyone today should send their children off by themselves. Paul and I sure didn't allow our kids to explore on their own any too soon. I remember the first time I left Amy in the yard of our first home in Creston all by herself. There were large picture windows so I could keep an eye on here - but it was on a somewhat busy corner...and the street...it was so close! I watched like a hawk.

The first time we left the kids at home without a sitter, the Kristina and Kim McFee were with them at our house. Amy must have been about 12 and we adults were just downtown. Let's just say it didn't go the best - something about our dog Moki barking and the big girls thought someone was there and they all went outside...We received a phone call and had to go home.

Everyone needs to know their own child's limits and slowly let the string out as they begin to function on their own. I saw a great quote yesterday - it's very appropriate here. It's by William G.T. Shedd. “A ship is safe in harbor, but that's not what ships are for.” You can't keep your kid in the harbor forever!

I feel fortunate that I grew up in the golden Free Range age. I hope today's children are allowed to range some too!

LOTO 2014

Pablo and I didn't understand the acronym at first when Donnie McKim emailed with the heading LOTO. Lots of terrible offers? Leap Off To Order?

I even googled it. Nothing. Then it hit me. Lake of the Ozarks. Yay - we love going to LOTO! We are friends with people who own property there. (and yes...we'd like 'em anyway without all their cool homes and stuff).

McKims purchased a place two years ago and Sharon and Allan Higgins are working on their third home there. I don't think you can call it "flipping" when you own each place that long. Both fams are turning diamonds (okay maybe they were rhinestones) in the rough into beautiful lake homes.

To save vacation time, I put a whole week of work hours in Monday through Wednesday. Working at the Iowa State Fair helped. I enjoy talking to people about all things environmental. And choosing what to eat during my break. #corndog, #pulledturkey, #lemonade.

On the McKim deck - flying the colors!
 

We took off for LOTO early Thursday. McKims, McFees and Higgins had all arrived prior. The guys got their handyman fix that afternoon - around the McKim place. We girls did some deck time. Later we headed out on the McKim 'toon (that's pontoon for you landlubbers) for wings and brews.

McKims' daughter Katie was there with her nifty doggy Lena - who loves to swim and ride in the boat. She's a golden doodle and the calmest pup ever - except when she sees ducks.

Sharon with Katie and Lena

On Friday, Katie headed out for home - we missed her and Lena. We headed out on the boat towards the dam - to meet our little buddy Judson. He'd never been to this lake. As a Missouri resident for 3+ years now it was about time. He drove down from St. Louis. Nice of Don and Dee to allow us to invite him along. GF Kara was working in Alabama - jealous girl! We met him at a bar and off we went to Coconuts!

We didn't actually stop at the Hillbilly Yacht Club - but the pic is effective

Coconuts - meat market! Fun to watch the activities

We didn't stay for "foam" and the band at 9:30 p.m. at Shady Gators...

Saturday started out a bit rainy. We ate breakfast in town and the boys did "errands". They did stop at a number of manly places like Mennards but I think some beer was involved. The girls went to the outlet mall. By late morning the clouds had mostly parted - it was boatin' time!

We proceeded to Snake Cove (named because of its snakey shape) to show Jud what "floating" is all about. Lake + noodles or some other flotation device and a beverage. We passed a group of dads and sons (ages 8-11ish) with a pontoon that had a diving platform roof. Some boys were doing flips. We applauded and egged them on. This is livin' ya'll.

My boys

After I'd floated for like 10 minutes Jud pointed out a snake swimming about 10 yards away from us - headed across the cove. Then it went under the water. Yikes! There was a made scramble as Bobbie got out of the water. Dee never got in. We were OVER Snake Cove - that was apparently not just named after the shape of the cove...


We ended up motoring to a more open area, tying the Lena (I'm trying out names for the McKim boat) up to a boat owned by a group from Cedar Rapids.  They are younger folks, likely in their early 40's, late 30's. They had a great sound system and were fun to talk to. No snakes. I loved floating with Jud and talking about life. #pricelessmoments

Now I see why it rained a bit on us. A bit cloudy!

That night we grilled hamburgers at McKims - excited to make it past 10 p.m. (I rested my eyes a bit earlier). I admit - I'm one of the first to bail out for bed. Sun, fun and liquor tire me out. In a good way!

We headed home early Sunday, a shade darker than lily white, despite application of oodles of sunscreen. The older I get, the more I appreciate good times with fam and friends. #luckygirl.

The boys...Jeff gave Jud valuable coffee drinking advice. Add Bailey's.

On the Pontoooon (in a singing manner)

We got a wee bit 'o work done Saturday morning. Al wanted his Sea-doo out of the water, and Jeff volunteered to ride it around to the nearest dock. What a nice man! Paul and Lucy cooked breakfast (see below). It held us until supper - rib sticking good!

I think she's singing along with her CD...

Bobbie made us each a CD of floating on the boat tunes! We sat on Don and Dee's new (for them) pontoon Saturday listening to it on a quiet cove (not a crazy party cove - yep we're growing up!) on Lake of the Ozarks. It was finally warmer - no sweats and jackets required. The water was chilly though. Ten plus inches of rain the week before dropped the water temp nearly ten degrees!

Jeff acts as first mate

Buddies huddle together for warmth on Thursday

While maybe not as sexy as other types of boats, the pontoon is a great party boat. Especially for old folks! It was quite comfy to get in and out of - no crawling over the side. Two thumbs up from this freeloader. We'll miss the McKim RV tailgating this fall - but the pontoon is a pretty good tradeoff. Donnie was a good captain too - we only got a bit wet from passing cruisers waves. No wall of water!

great pic of our farmer friend

After floating a while (and when we all needed to use the facilities) - we headed to Fish and Company. Dale Blue was the entertainment - and we tried to help! Diana manned the tambourine and I was called "camera girl" by Dale himself. The girls had fun dancing - some Kansas State friends helped too. Fellow Crestonites the Hueys were there with their son - kind of a Brad Pitt look alike. Cute!

Who knew the tambourine had a handle?

Young Mr. Huey talks to Jeff and Paul

The girls drank something blue...they said it was delish

Later we dropped Paul and Lucy off. Then we had another burst of energy. We stopped one more place and Diana sang karaoke! We ate pizza too. It was nearly dark by the time we pulled into the McKim place. 

breakfast at Eckhoffs Saturday a.m. - Paul E. made biscuits and gravy AND with hollandaise - had some great melon with it, so it wasn't all heart attack material

Of course McKims had the flag flying!

It was a long drive home to Iowa yesterday. But we were lucky, and got to hitch a ride down with McKims and a home with McFees. We left our car at WalMart in Osceola and it was still there when we got back. So that was a bonus. Laundry and a wiener dog awaited when we got home. Our dog/house sitter Kimmy McFee is heading back to pick up a second major at ISU. We'll miss you Kim. Odie was always alive when we got home! haha. If anyone knows a dog sitter in the WDM area - let me know.

I got through Monday and I'm still feeling the good vibes from the trip - grateful for our friends. I hope they know they can count on us too - if they need a fab vacation spot in Dez Moinezz. Or any other kind of support. And stuff.

Chillin' at the Lake

And I do mean chillin'. The first couple days...we wore our sweats at night. It was refreshing, really! Much different than two years ago when it was 100+ degrees each day. Life at the lake is like a box of chocolates - ya never know what you're going to get!

We were fortunate to again be invited to join our Creston pals at Lake of the Ozarks. It was a different kind of year - 2013. As we get older - we realize more and more how lucky we are to get to hang out with our longtime friends. They know all our stories and can help us finish them!

We're not getting any younger - or healthier. The knees are going, hips, shoulders - and worse. When I look at the pics of myself, I seem to look more and more like Pat Bullock. Who is that old lady and what happened to 40-year old me? This aging thing is not for the timid! But there's nothing to be done about it. (The alternative sucks worse!)

This I know - we must stick together for support. That was the only thing that got me through losing a son. Women are much better at this then men. Men are good at working on gutters together and talking sports and weather. But not at talking about their real worries. This is one of the reasons I'm glad I'm a girl!

Back to lake talk:

We stayed at the Higgins place - one they bought a different one a couple years ago. Al and Sharon have part of the place looking gorgeous and the rest...is still a work in progress. The location is very nice and the view - ahhh! (see above)

Then McKims got into the act. They purchased a lake place last fall - a real fixer upper. They're in the process of doing just that now, with the help of contractors and through their own blood, sweat and tears. Paul and Jeff got in on some of the fun, fixing gutters, mowing and more. I think Paul would have enjoyed spending the whole weekend there! He channeled his inner HGTV guy. Bobbie and I even helped a bit - touching up some paint. Then the girls tagged along to assist Diana in selecting sample flooring.

 



Al got Sharon this "Love the Lake" fire ring for her bday

One night we sat around a campfire - cooking marshmallows and singing camping songs. No - we didn't really sing - but we did discuss girl and boy scout stories. Bobbie and I recalled making "sit-a-pons" woven matts we tied to our waists, so we'd have an instant clean spot to sit on when camping. Don pointed out that boy scouts just chose not to sit in the dirt...smart ass. Man those Sharon cooked mellows were good!

 


Nothing like a campfire!

Love the way the lights shimmer off the lake

 

More tomorrow - tired...must go to bed 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life's just too short

Clint Bolinger RIP

Paul attended a work meeting in Corning Thursday and learned that the brother of two Creston friends passed away. Clint Bolinger, brother of Craig and Bill, had suffered from ALS for the past couple years, but very few people knew. That was how he wanted it.
Clint's Obituary

Paul and I didn't know Clint. He worked for an out of town contracting company - traveling and working on large building projects. We have known Clint's brothers and their families for many years. Craig and Ruth with their son Jesse, who is a few years older than Amy. Bill works as a technician for NRCS - so he worked with Paul for the past 20+ years. Since he's a huge hunter, they had lots besides work to discuss!

Clint was married to Amanda (Mandy) Berning - of the Bernings Hotel/restaurant in Creston. Mandy was the school nurse at St. Malachy part of the time the kids attended there. Clint and Amanda's two kids  Austin and Audrey attended St. Malachy, Austin is 5 years younger than Jud and Audrey a year younger than her brother.

Paul felt strongly about attending the visitation - to see his friends and express his sympathies. So after work yesterday we headed southwest to Creston and Powers Funeral Home. It wasn't something I wanted to do. I don't know Bill and Craig very well. I hesitate to put myself in painful positions if I don't have to. I'm selfish that way. But I decided I should go in support of Paul - and I was glad I did.

When we got to Powers Funeral Home, I got to see my dear friend Lamona Bilderback, who works at the Home part time assisting families at this difficult time in their lives. You'd never know she used to be a hard-assed loan officer at First National Bank, until she retired! Well..Mona wasn't ever really all that hard-assed. I loved working with her all those years ago though at FNB - and that was when we built our long friendship. It was fun to catch up with her.

We proceeded to line up to be greeted by the family. We spoke to several people we knew - some from Paul's former office. When we reached Bill, I could tell he was so pleased and surprised to see Paul. He told us his brother had not even told family about his illness - but when last year's tornado his and Clint was not around with his chainsaw, assisting with cleanup, they all knew something was up! By last week, Clint was having breathing problems and he went to the hospice just a day before he passed. A blessing really. Lou Gehrig's disease has to be one of the most rotten of all illnesses. His moved very quickly. Paul and Bill switched to a lighter topic - hunting of course after that discussion!

Next we moved on to talk to brother Craig, who is older than Bill. I'm not sure how we got to know him, but Paul bonded with him early during our time in town. He ran into Craig just last year in Des Moines at the Deer Classic - they really enjoy each other's company. Clint's children and wife Mandy were next in line. They were hardest to speak to! How badly I feel for them - to lose their father and life partner at this young age.

Austin has just finished a year at the Air Force Academy. I was surprised to see that as last I knew he was at Iowa State. I told him about my cousin Amy's daughter's boyfriend. He is attending there to play baseball. That caught his interest - and was a nice distraction from the usual death discussion...I told the kids who we were and who Amy and Jud were. Austin remembered being a buddy with Jud on some St. Malachy project. That is one thing we loved about the school - the mixing of younger and older students. Our kids enjoyed it when they were the young ones anyway. Austin probably remembers Jud as a kicker too as that was something he did. Audrey just finished her frosh year at NWMSU (Maryville) and she runs track.

All of them seemed to be holding up so well - but their lives these past few months - watching their dad/husband die a slow death had to be hell. This almost has to be a relief for now. The finality of it will hit them later. Prayers for this fine family are welcome!

As we headed out, we spoke to others we knew. Ryan and Jennifer Hoyt and their new baby boy - we had them as a marriage ministry couple, prior to their wedding. They recently moved back to town - Jennifer is a pharmacist at HyVee. She's a year older than Amy. It was great to see Mandy's folks - Bob and Frieda Berning - a couple we got to know through our church and through the St. Malachy Foundation. They gave us hugs and said they miss us. We miss them! Frieda laughed when I told her that we enjoy living together full time again - and still like each other! Paul got cornered by Rich Wenzig, a dirt contract before we got out the door. But he saw my look and didn't take too long!

Despite the reason for the gathering, the visitation made me miss Creston a lot. We're pretty anonymous in West Des Moines. That's our fault! I know we'll make friends and it just takes time. But we built our relationships there over 26 years - I miss and value that.

We headed to McFees and helped Bobbie and Jeff load their Suburban up. Kimmy is going back to school. She will pick up a 2nd major in Genetics - her goal is to do research. Jeff says this is IT for him and moving kids. We'll see! Donnie came over and we got pizza. Diana was off getting pretty (haircut). We sat outside on a gorgeous August evening - unseasonably cool. We got home to WDM about 10:15 p.m.

This morning? Waveland - I had a hankerin' for cinnamon French Toast. Then the Farmers Market. We saw Bob and Pam McKee, Mike, Judy and Maddie Moffitt - Crestonites! And my college roomie Jane Flack Conn and her daughter Morgan. We scored sweet corn and tomatoes are here! BLTs this weekend. Fresh bread, blueberries, and dutch letters for tomorrow a.m.

Another week past...

The countdown is on. Two more weeks until the movers are here. We'll be putting the "stuff" of our lives into a big truck. That's weird.

Hope he's not a back seat driver!

At this moment 2 deer heads are in my car to take to my former roomie Joan's place (shhh - she doesn't know she'll have a couple little friends staring at her for a while yet). The movers wanted $1,000 each to move them - crating and uncrating. No thanks! There are 2 more in the basement awaiting transport later. Paul parted with one - it's at the Holy Spirit ReRun Shop if you have a burning desire for a deer head.

This week Paul is pheasant hunting in South Dakota with college buddies, Mike Huston and Tom Sullivan. He's done this hunt the past few years and he always has a great time hanging with his buddies, and they get a few birds too. I plan to get together with Joan while he's gone - we need to catch up!

Great ISU game day yesterday with a victory over Baylor! McFees rode up with us and we drove by our new home on the way to the game. Bobbie and Jeff said they think they can find their way back - we'll have a room for them on Cody Drive! This week we purchased the dining table, a love seat and some art from the sellers. On a similar note, we sold our table/chairs and some other stuff to our home buyers. That worked out great! Our realtors have been swell on this regard. Shout out to Roger Saxton and Marg Hull.

Check out radiant heater - ahhhh

Paul chats with Jud's buddy Mitch

 

It was a chilly day, but Don's niece brought a radiant heater. It was great! It was soup day - 4 kinds of soups were perfect! Plus pumpkin and apple bars - and bevvies of your choice. Jud wasn't there (he and Kara were at her cousin's wedding in Tampa) but his buddies showed up in force and we still love them - and they helped us eat soup! Donnie's college roomie Jim and wife Patty were there - they just moved to Denver from St. Louis, because their 2 children live there. Paul and I attended the Spirit Walk to High 5 the players entering the stadium for the game.

The team runs to the students and sings the fight song

And then our beloved Cyclones came through with a glorious Homecoming victory. It was college football at its finest. The 54K crowd was lovin' it! We did The Wave 3 ways - regular, slow and on crack (really fast). It was really fun. The alumni band played with the Iowa State University VARSITY (Not the JV dammit) Marching Band played. The sound system played all the good tunes that old ladies like to dance to. Diana and I stood on one leg to help the defense stop Baylor on third down situations. (We do what we can).

CPR - on left

After the game we had passes (because McKim's son Ryan is on the coaching staff) to go in the "Jake" building where the team locker room is. Former Cyclone great Seneca Wallace was there. Coach Rhoads came out. Everyone was joyful!

The drive home was late, but Jeff has imbibed enough liquor to entertain us most of the way. His head started bobbing about ten minutes from home. We are happy and blessed people!

Brother-In-Law Bolder Report: Bolder was not able to have his first full chemo due to low platelets. He did have a partial one. They'll try again soon. Please keep Bold and my sister Cindy and their son Colby in your prayers. They will need all our strength and good thoughts during this time.