Toughest job I ever loved

It's Mother's Day Weekend. I always think of my Mom - forgetting that it's my day too. Until my cool kids remind me.

I've been a mommy nearly 30 years now! I've never been a natural at it - I'm the first to admit it. I didn't grow up learning how to nurture babies. I was only 5 when my little sis Betso was born. I don't remember much about her babyhood and didn't help with bottles or care. I wasn't asked to babysit infants - a wise move by Atlantic parents.

I never changed a diaper until I gave birth to Amy Elizabeth Goldsmith. The Dr. Spock baby book was my friend, along with advice from my pal Vicki who had given birth to Kelli Marie a few months earlier. Paul and I faked it. Good thing babies are resilient little things.

Amy was an easy baby, except for her penchant for projectile puking. Who knew babies could hit walls from a distance of 3 feet? We finally figured out she had a milk allergy and soy formula solved that problem. I spent many early mornings at our little rental home in Osage watching the PTL (Praise The Lord) Network at 5:30 a.m. Oh...it wasn't because I was into Tammy Faye Baker (and her teary eyes). It was because the good cartoons came on right after that! I also loved cuddling with my little red-haired honey.

I remember wondering why the nurses were trusting us to take this little baby home - even with our second child, Jud. After carrying a baby inside you for 9 months, all of the sudden you've got this little life to deal with. It can be overwhelming - especially when sleep-deprived. I'd put Jud in the baby swing and wind it up - before heading downstairs for a quick shower. Was that okay? Those are the kind of things that a young mom can beat herself up about. There aren't books for every little thing - and we do the best we can.

I like to hear my co-workers talk about what their children are doing. It reminds me of the things Amy and Jud used to do. The stages of introducing solid foods, diapers, going to the playground, playing with friends, youth sports, movies and music - there are so many good memories. And some that weren't that great - that kept us awake nights.

Even though Amy and Jud are "all growed up" and live far away now, I think about them every day and text them often. We will see them soon - heading to visit Amy Memorial Day weekend and Jud in June. I am so very proud of the adults they have grown up to be. My job as Mommy will never be over. It's a title I love.