She Called Me Les

San Antonio 2011

Bobbie McFee was one of the first people I met when Paul and I moved to Creston. Rejected by each of the 28 or so sororities when I attended rush as an 18-year-old at Iowa State University, I found my true sisters with Beta Sigma Phi, a women's sorority as a 28-year-old. Bobbie was a new-found sister back in 1987 who later became much more. And she called me Les - a name only my besties use.

After completing the DSM half marathon (walking) Bobbie didn't get the "wear your medal" memo

We're devastated to think this person who was so full of life could pass in a blink with no warning. We are so sad for her husband Jeff - two people who meshed so beautifully. Jeff met Bobbie through her Creston roomie Retta Baker, at Northwest Missouri State University where Bobbie earned her degree. Jeff was a persistent farmer from Creston who attended the local community college, eventually earning his 4-year degree later from Buena Vista.

Those two were truly meant for each other. I keep picturing them swing dancing together - not always technically perfect, but they knew each other's moves and would "go with it" adjusting to what each other did. They were fun to watch - having fun and you could see the love they shared as they moved around the floor.

What a cute family! 

We mourn together with their daughters Kristina and Kim. They are our children Amy and Jud's ages. That is one reason why we spent so much time together as families. On many a weekend evening, one of us would call the other and we'd make a plan to share an evening meal. The kids would play and we "adults" could chat about all things - raising kids, jobs, families, farming, and more. We raised those kids together. We all shared love and admiration for each other - plus a sense of humor! Bobbie and Jeff have always been such positive people - glass half full. Those are people you want to be around.

Kristina and Kim have lost their mother, their biggest fan, listening ear, and their advisor. I'm so sad for them about that. My mom died from lung cancer when I was 40, so older than they are now. Even then I felt robbed of the comfort of a mother - the heart of our family. Jeff is a great dad and will continue to be. Paul and I will try to think of ways we can support this family missing Bobbie.

Kristina has two young daughters under age 5. I'm so sorry that they won't personally remember Grandma Bobbie. I'm sad that now that I'll be a Grandma I won't have the opportunity to get more tips from her! She already told me a couple stories of her times with the girls that I cherish. Just like Bobbie took on all challenges, Bobbie didn't let fussy grandkids fluster her. After keeping the kids overnight in Creston, when delivering the young girls back to their folks in Ankeny, the baby began shrieking in the rear-facing car seat. Not a happy girl. Bobbie didn't stop as she'd already tried several methods to calm the youngster. So she just put some good tunes on the car radio and began to sing at the top of her lungs! Eventually, the little one ran out of steam and konked out. It will be our job now to tell Bobbie stories to the girls - so they know just who their Grandma Bobbie was.

Bobbie did not really believe in allowing herself much leisure time. She was most happy working on projects. She'd just plunge in. Recently, during the pandemic, she painted the inside of their Creston home. Every room! She only got help on the highest peaks of their cathedral ceiling. She loved to exercise, ride bikes and walk - quickly.

We had some good times in Des Moines in recent years when she and Jeff came up to bike with us. We may have overdone the beer to bike mile ratio!

Farmer's Market visit

Don McKim always laughed that Bobbie could be a "sprinter" when we had group gatherings. One legendary time a group of Cyclone fans attended an ISU/KSU football game at Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City. A vendor was handing out free Monster energy drinks which Bobbie mixed with vodka. Then she invited herself into a fancy tailgate party with a live band and food! The rest of us were standing behind Higgins' Suburban in the parking lot. Not a super football fan, Bobbie konked out during the game, sleeping with her head on Jeff's shoulder.  I'll miss hearing her version when reminiscing about all those times we've had together.

I enjoyed talking to Bobbie about work. She was a very effective and dedicated comptroller - most recently at a plant in Creston that makes giant equipment that peels potatoes and carrots. They had a branch in Boise, ID so she told us how she got to know that area, mostly on her own. With a previous job, Bobbie and Jeff traveled to far off locations like Germany and Thailand - they loved to visit new places.

I'm so sad for Bobbie's family - her parents Bob and Grace, and her brothers and families. And Jeff's family including my former roomie Joanie. Since we don't have family around Creston, Paul and I have been lucky to be invited to some of their gatherings, so we feel a bit like cousins. Bobbie's loss will hit hard for them all. We will need to try honor Bobbie by keeping our memories of her alive.

Bobbie moved into Creston and won the hearts of Crestonians right away - even with farmers, no small feat. She served on the school board and volunteered for many other things - always dependable. When our son Patrick lived his brief life in 1991, she and Jeff were there for us. She brought ham balls for the funeral - it's a SW Iowa thing. That's what I kept thinking yesterday as we visited the house to see the family. Bobbie would bring ham balls to this. I expected her to drive up and take charge.

Bobbie had a road bike and kept up with the guys. Albie (my crosstrainer bike) and I brought up the rear 

Paul and I traveled to Creston to the house yesterday. Several family members were there and a steady stream of neighbors and friends stopped by to drop off food and to express their sympathies. It's what you do - surround the family with love. This week will be a blur. It will be our job to be there for Jeff and the girls after the funeral too.

We all need reminders of how special each day is. 2020 has worked on that. This reminder hurts so badly. RIP my friend. I  hope you are in your Happy Place forever.

Last year - Lake of the Ozarks - Bobbie's "Happy Place"