Paul and I took a walk at Walnut Woods State Park today to celebrate our son, Patrick's birthday - December 2, 1991. He only lived six days due to a heart defect, hypoplastic left ventricle. While he's not been an active part of our lives since his birth, he made a definite impact.
Losing Patrick put me into a tailspin. Until then, my life was a breeze. Childhood, college, job, marriage, two healthy children (girl, boy). Except for a previous miscarriage, not much had gone wrong in my life. When one's life is like that, you don't expect things to go wrong. Boy did it!
When Patrick died, people reached out and supported our family. That was one lesson I learned from that experience - the humility of accepting that support. Grieving was extremely hard work - especially with a six and three-year-old at home, needing our care. It hurts now thinking back on that time in my life. I feel bad for that young woman that was me. And for all parents and families that have lost children.
My beliefs and political persuasion changed after we lost our son. While I can't say these changes are a direct result of Patrick, he is a part of me. As the years go by the pain of loss eases. Every once in a while the scar of grief rips open and I feel the sadness of what we have missed out on. Today we celebrate Patrick's birthday. Never forgotten.
It was a beautiful day today. No wind and sunny with a temperature of about 60 degrees. Walnut Woods is a beautiful park, full of hardwood trees. We started hiking by a bird blind, spying several species. My phone camera didn't pick them up, however. The Raccoon River is quite low, likely due to the lack of rain this year. The year Patrick was born we had a big snowstorm Halloween weekend, but this year, no such thing! I hope you too are enjoying this weekend. Thanks for your support through the years.
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