Can you tell I've been watching Nurse Jackie on Netflix. I like complex characters - in books, movies and television. Nurse Jackie, the drug addicted ER nurse epitomizes the term complex. Jackie, played by Edie Falco, does a crackerjack job of making you love the highly competent nurse and person that she can be. Yet the addict Jackie infuriates. She cheats on her husband, messes up her daughters, lies to co-workers and steals from them. She endangers patients - and does not see this as against her oath as a nurse.
I became addicted to the show Nurse Jackie and began thinking about addiction and the idea of the good/bad sides of people. There are seven seasons of the show on Netflix. I've watched them all in the past few weeks. In the first few seasons, the good things about Jackie outweigh the bad things. Now, in later seasons, I'm disgusted by the things Jackie has done. She slid further and further down the addiction hole. She is the best liar ever. In real life I can't believe an addict could keep all those lies straight. I can believe how those around an addict want to believe the lies.
I believe each of us has a good and a bad side - we have to choose our own path. It's been interesting how the producers of the show have allowed this character to slide downhill. It's even harder to watch people slide like that in real life.
I believe we all have tenancies for addiction - some of us have stronger tenancies than others. I know how easy habits are to slip into. A cappuccino here, a hot bath there - a glass of wine. Next thing you know, it's a daily thing. Some addictions can be a good thing, like exercise. Even exercise can be an addiction if it controls you.
Addictions don't follow the rules of logic - something I struggle with as I watch the show Nurse Jackie. Just when she seemed to have her life squared away - one year sober, a new boyfriend and a job going well, she messed it up by using again. It's like she sabotaged her life on purpose. How does one combat that? I'm watching Season 7, the last season, now. It will be interesting to see how the producers put this one to bed. I can't believe they will allow an ending that is too rosy, considering what a trainwreck Jackie's life as been to date. I hope they allow a glimmer of hope for happiness for the family and others who love Jackie.
Life can be hard. We all do the best we can. I'll keep working toward the good me on this journey.
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