Another year of wedded bliss

Our children have gone through the process of getting engaged and Jud is now married to Kara (yay!). Amy is planning a wedding! She and Corey will be married next August.
It's a lot of fun and it's made me think more about who I was when I went through that process - that culminated 34 years ago today. Yes, it's our Wedding Anniversary! 8/28/82.

Biking 2016

Weddings are a lot more complex today than they were in the early 80's. Of course my mother planned much of mine, so that helped. She was good at that stuff! I didn't have to find a venue. We got married in Atlantic, so the venue was the Catholic Church at 2 p.m. - as late as you could have a wedding at our church. Paul has a large family and all them were there, along with lots of aunts and uncles. Right after the ceremony there must have been a short break, because I went to the hospital to visit my grandpa, Bubba, in the Atlantic Hospital. Some of the group must have gone to the celebrated White Rose, a beer only bar on Highway 6 that was open only until 9 p.m.

I had my 3 college roomies stand up with me along with sister Betso. Paul had buddies from college. Our Best Man, Mike Huston borrowed a full sized van from my parent's friends the Clitheros and filled it with stuffed animals like a raccoon and a duck for our ride around town after we tied the knot! They even had a duck call cassette playing!

There was an early reception at the Atlantic Golf and Country Club, which was still in all its glory at that time. It makes me sad that today the Country Club doesn't have a kitchen staff, because they don't have enough business. We had many nice family meals in that dining room - with Choral (sp?) serving the hash browns extra crispy just how Dad like them.

Mom picked the menu for the Country Club reception, and Paul and I approved. She even helped decorate. After the formal reception for everyone, there was a smaller reception for out of towners at our home at 202 Crombie where friends of my family served roast beef sannies with all the sides. It turned into a cool August evening and I eventually put on jeans and Mom's golf sweatshirt. So that's what I had on when Paul and I checked into the hotel - with him in a white tuxedo. It looked like I ran away with the groom!

And all these years later I still feel pretty lucky running away with that groom. Relationships are fluid. We certainly are not the same sweet kids that got married 34 years ago. For fifteen years in Creston Paul and I served in a ministry working with engaged couples getting married in the Catholic Church. That was one thing we always stressed - you're picking the person you will go through good times and bad with. I pick him!

Our honeymoon Victoria, Canada

Love 'O my life

Today is Paul and my 28th Anniversary. Congratulations to us! Since the date actually fell on a Saturday this year, I've been thinking about events of all those many years ago and ...(wayback machine, wavy lines indicating memory).

When I met Mr. Paul G. Goldsmith back in the fall of 1978. We were at Aunt Maude's. No - that's not my aunt's place, it's a restaurant in Ames - still there today. Back then they had great hors d'ouevres on Friday nights (FAC - Friday Afternoon Club). So we'd head there for drinks and a meals worth of munchie.

Sal, Jane, Vic and I had moved into our apartment at 230 Campus Avenue and discovered that our friends from skiing and 1st Floor of Maple Hall were also living in that complex - a couple doors down. They had some cute guys living in their section - and we all ended up at Maude's that afternoon. The guys - Schneid and Schultzie introduced us to their friend Goldy who had been away that fall doing an internship someplace in SW Iowa. I didn't think much of meeting him - no sparks flew or anything.

That next spring, Goldy came to our door soliciting players for his coed softball team - Sal, Jane and I were on board. Goldy seemed very organized and serious about the whole thing - we actually practiced and ended up being pretty good. I recall seeing him walk by with a date one time when we chicks were on the deck in front of the apartment. (We'd put Jane's 13" black and white TV out there to watch soap operas)

So it was surprising when he first asked me out. In fact I'm a bit fuzzy on the whole order of what happened when. Maybe there was alcohol involved...He wanted me to mend and wash his filthy baseball pants - that sticks in my mind! My roomies and I chuckled over that one. He had me over to his apartment and cooked a deer roast - I bit into a beebee. Other than that it was good though! I thought he was nice enough, but didn't figure him for the love of my life - he was pretty rough around the edges - a real farm boy who needed some work.

But I did enjoy his love of wildlife. One of our early dates he took me to Emma McCarthy Lee (sp?) Park in Ames where we checked his traps for voles - a project for a class. When he found one, he'd snip its toenail and let it go. And I liked his friends - mostly from his dorm floor at the Towers - Baker. Nice group of guys and they all liked him.

The summer of 1979 I became his softball groupie. I stayed in Ames for the summer - Vic and I followed Minsky's slo pitch team that Paul and Fred played on. It was fun partying with the team after games. We even went to tournaments - one was near Atlantic so we stopped in at my folks house and they got to meet him as Goldy. Vic and Fred were with us too. Even then I thought - well it's probably a temporary thing until I meet Mr. Right.

College - senior year. I keep seeing Paul, but not one of those "I must be with you all the time" things. We hung out with Moose and Steve, had parties, and organized a huge group to ski including all Paul's buddies and my buddies - some 20+ people total in one condo. Good time. We spent more time getting to know each other (more wavy lines and hearts).

By graduation, Mom and Dad figured out that Goldy was my "boyfriend" and I had met some of Paul's family (he told them he was bringing a surprise to a Sunday meal - they were prolly expecting a ham...). I went off to Sioux Falls to work. He had a quarter of school to finish up. I was damn lonely - away from my friends, no peers etc. Angst on the phone. Paul sent love letters. He drove all the way to see me. We spent a lot of time really getting to know each other without the distractions of our other friends and activities of college.

I discovered he is a wonderful guy, very loyal and caring. Not always the most romantic - but then, neither am I. He's even tempered and fun to travel with. We share an interest in team sports - mostly basketball and football, but we grew to love volleyball and soccer too years later. So after my first few months in Sioux Falls, and my move to Omaha in 1981, I knew he was the one for me!

I'm not sure what my parents thought. Paul had rough edges - farm kid who had good family support, but he was not schooled in the ways of the Country Club. (I have done wonders with his clothing selection - just ask his sisters..) I'm sure parents secretly hope their children will marry someone rich so they won't have to ever worry about money. That was not the case with us. Neither of our jobs made us rich! My engagement ring is the size most of today's brides would use to compliment their "real" diamond.

But through the years my parents came to appreciate Paul as a great son-in-law - dependable and a great husband and daddy. Recently at niece Leslie's wedding, Jordan made some comment about our marriage - can't quite remember how she put it, but it was a compliment. I've heard it from others too.

It's not perfect. We argue and treat each other poorly - what 2 people could ever live together this long and not? But I can't think of anyone I want by my side more in good times and in bad. Marriages are living things - they grow and change along with the people or they die. After 28 years ours is still alive and kicking!